I received one of the best gifts that Christmas can offer and that is to give back. I gave back to my community in a very unique way. I've talked about this Elmhurst College event before but this year I had a chance to put my heart and talent into Lessons and Carols. Lessons and Carols is a composition of music and readings of the story of Jesus’ birth. I have had the honor of reading from the Bible for this event for the past two years. In June (yes, I really mean six months ago), I e-mailed the Chaplain at Elmhurst and asked to please do a reflection during this service. Chaplain Scott agreed and I was thrilled. And then after a few months, a question loomed over me: what do I say? I thought about this quite a bit. What message was good enough? What did God want me to say to those many, many people including my family, great aunts and uncles, friends, therapists and neighbors from home? This was my family and my Elmhurst College family who are the most important people in the world to me. After much thought, reflection, and prayer, I came up with this.
When I was a little girl growing up, we would drive to the airport and there he would be; my grandfather would be at the airport with his Santa Claus hat on ready to hug me. It is probably the fondest memory of childhood I have. Seeing my grandfather who we called Pops, ceased the anticipation of Christmas time. It was here! I got that warm, fuzzy feeling because I knew everything was OK because it was Christmas. We would bake cookies with Nana, and Pops would act like he was not interested but twenty minutes later he somehow became the king of the kitchen. Pops died in 2006 right before Thanksgiving. His untimely death caused for a very difficult Christmas. I didn’t feel that rush of goodness throughout my body despite my best efforts. The man, who had caused the anticipation of Christmas to end, was now with Christ in heaven. It was not fair to me or my family. The next Christmas, 2007 was better but certainly still melancholy. I did not have that rush of goodness like I did when Pops was with us.
In 2008, I saw that this event lessons and carols was happening and I decided to go. After I walked out of this very chapel, I got that rush of goodness back. It felt like a part of me that was missing for those two years had finally returned. I got that warm, fuzzy feeling back instead of feeling chilled like I had been feeling for the past two Christmases. Many of you know me well enough to know that when I like something, I get involved. I have been a reader for this service for the past two years and have the honor of reflecting with you today which I thank Reverend Scott and Chaplain Kevin for. This service brought the anticipation of advent back. This is a priceless feeling. We wait for so much in life. Whether it is for a loved one to get well, for soldiers to return home, or for a sign that the season of advent has begun, God makes it worth the wait, and He tends to have a discreet way of healing your heart. He led me to a service that filled my heart with what could only be known as the Christmas spirit. Needless to say, I still very much miss Pops especially at Christmas, but since I know exactly what I wait for each year, the waiting is not that hard and I don’t worry about feeling numb, because when each and every one of you light your candles at the end of mass it will fill my heart with joy, and I cannot thank you enough for that. God bless.
This is my last Christmas at Elmhurst so this was the beginning of bittersweet moments. I'm glad I had the opportunity to thank Elmhurst for four wonderful Christmases.
I hope you’re filled with the Christmas spirit like I am. I've been listening to Christmas music since Thanksgiving dinner ended and haven't stopped. I'm hoping that my family can make it to the church in Elmhurst that I got confirmed in and to see my precious godson on New Years. I wish you the merriest of Christmases, happiest of Hanukkahs, and a joyful Kwanzaa! And, of course a happy New Year!
Spread Some Joy,
Hannah!
P.S. Only 5-6 more posts of Hannah's College Adventures left...it is unbelievable!
