This month marked two significant events throughout this year for me. First, my junior year of college came to a graceful end. Following that, Will, my cousin’s child got baptized and I became his godmother.
Ending classes and moving out of my dorm was easier this year. I was incredibly worn out from the work I produced for two semesters. It is not easy but I did get four A's and one B which I'm proud of. I had a great but difficult first semester on top of a stressful January term and then I succeeded second semester. It is a decision to succeed and I am constantly making that decision. The definition of success to me is when you see the goal and try your very best; just to try something is succeeding in life. You don't have to be first place; you simply have to try running. I don't care about you winning trophies or awards, I care about the effort, I care about the heart, and I care about you in every aspect of that race. If you are collapsing during the race, you're not considering your well-being and that's important! If you don't run the race well, it won't mean as much, I can guarantee that! If the race is for others, or your resume, or something else, you won't truly succeed. Trying your best is succeeding. When you truly succeed, you feel it in your bones and your heart.
You can also feel your heart exploding when a baby is in your arms. William James Endres was placed into my lap and I immediately fell in love. This baby is my godson and he has already brought so much joy to my life. The weekend was consumed with our love for this little bundle of joy. When I was up there witnessing the baptism, I felt such an honor because out of everyone they could of chose, they chose me. They could have chosen anyone but I was their choice. It gave me another sense of purpose in this short life. I am grateful for the honor and privilege of being a godmother.
I was also blessed enough to speak at two schools this month. One school needed questions answered about college for students with special needs and the other school had a bullying issue that needed to be stopped by Hannah Thompson. I spoke to the special education students about the trials and triumphs of college life. I forgot how it felt to have college be a mystery instead of a home. They reminded me of why I go to college and that is to pave the way for others; I did not go to college simply for myself. I did it for kids like Rachel and Hannah who were the primary students I spoke to. They have a world of unique possibilities before them. I didn't go to say, "I did it", I went to make their lives easier. I make sure when I do big things, I do not do them solely for myself. I have the opportunity to make lives easier just by showing up for class. Who gets that? Who on earth is lucky enough to have that power? How could I not say I'm tremendously blessed?
When I spoke to the school about bullying, I ended with this: Each and every one of you has a light that will help the world shine. And that starts with not bullying other people because they happen to be different. I know you don’t want to dim the light of another person because then the world isn’t as bright as it could be. That would be such a sad thing.
After the speech, my sister attended a party with these same kids and I was in the car. They ran up to me like I was a rock star. I had an incredible sense of validation. I had touched these young children. That is why I know God wants me to be a motivational speaker. I feel a sense of success and purpose when I am in front of an audience. It's my place as a citizen of this earth.
When I say "God", what do I mean? I mean God, Brahman, Allah, Buddha, Yahweh, Krishna, or simply the feeling you have when you succeed or have a sense of purpose.
